Another great way to start off a new blog.. I almost passed out last night due to some very horrific fumes leaking in our house.. that came from Aaron's ass! Aaron and I worked out last night and then decided to make salads and rice for dinner. We were sitting on our bedroom floor, b/c we had a fire in our fireplace, watching Wife Swap when BAM!! Something hit me in the face like a brick wall, the stinch of Aaron's butt! I almost fainted and screamed "Did you just toot?" and he just looked at me like he didn't want to answer even though it was pretty obvious. His reply "I just did, but it was out in the computer room and I thought I aired it out " my response "Um, no! That crap still followed your skanky butt in here!!" After several gasps later and keeping my face inside my own shirt as a homemade gas mask.. I was able to breath again. Maybe 10 minutes later, the same smell hits me like a brick wall..... not happy, I yell at Aaron "what did you eat today, you nasty fool?!!" He immediately jumps up and runs towards our bathroom while saying "I'll go to the bathroom..."
That all happened around 7:30-ish. So then at 10:30, I'm trying to go to bed and Aaron has left the lamp light on by our bed, the overhead light and the TV. I ask him to shut it all off b/c I am tired and I have to get up early unlike him. He says he is going to eat his cookies and milk then go to bed... so I have to listen to "crunch, crunch.. gulp, slurp, crunch" for a few minutes.. then he gets up and goes into the bathroom.. leaving all the lights on and the TV blaring. I scream at him this time "Aaron, shut the freaking TV off you selfish son of a biscuit" He says "I'm on the pot, I will in a minute" So, I get up and turn it all off and get back into bed.. right as I am drifting off to sleep.. I feel Aaron get into bed and I smell what I think is the cat's litter box laying in the bed next to me. It was Aaron's fat butt, he smelled like a fresh cat turd. I yell at him to go wipe his ass better b/c he smelled horrible. All the while, he is laughing hysterically. And I wonder, I chose to live with this man and I WANT to marry him?? Help me, am I insane?
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4 comments:
You crack me up.
Greg wiped a booger on my arm the other day.
Boys are gross.
Do you care if I link to you?
That was way too funny! I have tears!!! Keep them going, I need a good laugh sometimes!
haha!!! does aaron know you actually write blogs about it? haha, it was so funny! well now i know why you call him stinky bear!!!
I have to admit that fart jokes are not my cup of tea.
But I have to say that ring or no, you guys are MARRIED!
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